On The Arm of Fabulousness

July 24, 2010


Let me just go on the record that I have huge gazongas. I’m not talking the nice, full voluptuous 36Cs that I had as a senior in high school. No, I have the back-breaking 40DDDs. That’s right ladies; there are three, count them, 1-2-3, in that cup size.
Thank you babies, breastfeeding, and the 60 pounds I’ve packed on since college. They don’t fit in nursing bras that will hold them each separately anywhere near where they previously resided so I’m stuck with the tank-top Target nursing bras that leave me with a uni-boob and two nipples. HAWT!

The tummy and hips aren’t a pretty sight either. I wish I could blame the pains of pregnancy on those two, but my curvature was established long before the buns were in the oven. I have a long torso, about 60 pounds more than I need and one hell of a time trying to find clothes that I feel comfortable in. Gimme a shirt that covers the belly and pants that cover my whale-tale and I’m a happy camper. On most days I’m looking every so chic in my high rise jeans and long t-shirts but damn if I can’t work my high heels and Coach sunglasses.

And this look works fabulously for running to Target or the park, throw in a formal event such as a wedding and I’m screwed! It’s always a struggle to find something more sophisticated to fit my body. Most of the cute tops are a little too low cut for my tastes; I’m ok with showing a little cleavage but I’d rather the cup merely trickle tastefully not runneth over. And as for hiding the tummy, all I have to say is this, Spanx are proof that God is a woman. Formal  fashion wear and I are not friends.

A few weeks back there was family event that required a little more pizzazz than my Levis would allow so it was time to break out the formal wear. And wouldn’t you know it, after the space shuttle launch like planning of getting two children and a husband prepared for the 6 hour event, I was left with about 5 minutes to get myself ready. After a quick re-pack of the diaper bag I ran upstairs to throw on the outfit I had planned in my head. Cute flowing skirt, floral print top, ahhh, if only it had been that simple.

Spanx: no where to be found.

Floral print top: majorly stained.

Actual bra minus the nursing flaps: major boob spillage issues.

Damn. What’s a Mommy to do?

Throw on what ever looks/smells clean and let your children do the rest for you.

My children are beautiful. I know, every mommy thinks their children are beautiful way but seriously, mine are stinkin’ cute. The Toddler is a sun-kissed blonde with brown eyes and lashes that curl up to meet the heavens. In high school, I would have hated her.

The Baby is a blue-eyed, drooly puddle of cuteness that smiles with her entire body: eyes light up, nose scrunches in, and her whole body coils before she springs into a giggly jumping bean of grins. You can’t help but beam at her.

The Toddler is nervous in social situations and tends to cling to my waist/hip area completely hiding my ass. The Baby isn’t walking yet and has this way of tucking into my shoulder covering one boob completely giving the impression that I actual have more than just a shelf sitting on top of my chest.

The imperfections of my body are flawlessly hidden with the little perfections that came from my body.

I’ve noticed that with a beautiful baby in someone’s arms and a gorgeous toddler around the leg, no one even looks at the mom anyway. And you know what; I’m totally ok with that.


Originally posted on http://mommysstillfabulous.com/ 


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8 Responses to “On The Arm of Fabulousness”

  1. Kelly Says:


    Although, I put my foot down on being the only adult dressing others. While I plan all outfits, I force my husband to help execute them. This has been so freeing!

  2. Joy Says:

    I feel that way alot of the time, it is so much easier to make the kids look fabulous especially the little diva since I can just throw a super cute dress on her with her tan, blonde hair and blue eyes all eyes are on her and not me:) oh and I have perfected the posing in pictures with them so they hide the imperfections I even looked decent in a bathing suit picture with them hiding most of me:)

  3. Rapunzel Says:

    Looove your blog, and this post is hysterically true. While mine aren’t in the double or triple range, my girls are much larger than they used to be and I’m finding it challenging as well. However, after a lifetime of 34B’s, I’m kinda enjoying the cleavage. ;)

  4. Jade Says:

    DDD are you kidding me? Whoa – that’s HOT – work ‘em mama!

  5. Mama Kat Says:

    And when you arrange the children in front of you juuust so…nobody really see anything at all. What mother? Where?? ;)

    Thanks so much for your nice comment today! You made my day. :)

  6. darcie Says:

    HMMM – Maybe I SHOULD push for that 3rd baby after all…I’ve only got two perfections to hide my imperfections!

  7. Meaghan Says:

    Very true. I really dont get out much since welcoming my little man and money is tight so I haven’t had the chance to do some new shopping. I figure it doesnt really matter that much since he really is the best accessory!
    (ps I tried to respond to your earlier comment on my blog – not sure if you got the email, but let me know if you would still like a Daily Dose of Fitness post!)

  8. dawn Says:

    I love this post! It is all so true! I just found your blog and it’s great!